Cork Ireland?

[lauraabranson]

I'm currently a 17 yr old female college student in the US. Over the summer I met quite a few Irish friends from Cork, we got to talking and they invited me to visit them on my college break in December . I have since september save up the 800.00 dollars for my plane fare. I talked to my mom who has never traveled outside our current state if I could go, she agreed hesitantly. My grandma just got me my passport during the summer yet does not know about my trip, my mom said I could go under one cindition: I have to tell my grandparents I'm going. My grnadfather is against travel and my Grandma is a very active travel, in her early 20's she went all over Europe with her first husband and last summer we went on a 3 month roadtrip all around the US, so she is very open to travel, yet not so much international travel where I am involved. I am very independant and careful and observant ans she remineds me of his on a daily basis. Yet I know if I tell her I'm going she will be very much so against it, Since she pays for my college she could use that as a "if you go I wont pay" It's like an investment that everyone in my family ahs to keep safe. I don't know how to bring it up to her or prove to her that I should be allowed to go for the two weeks.

[Elizabeth]

Sounds like a fun trip!

Why is your grandfather so against international travel? Does he think it is unsafe? Or some other reason?

When you sit down with grandma and grandpa speak as if you're going (in a respectful way of course). "Hey guys guess what! I've been working at my part time job for x months to save up for a trip to Ireland!" Don't ask permission. No one asks permission to do something great, they seize the opportunity!!!

Show them that you've done your research. Show them an itinerary...where you're going and where you're staying. If they like your friends then tell Gparents that you're going to be staying with friends and/or they'll be showing you around. If your Gparents don't know your friends play that aspect down and show them you've booked a hostel (with cancellation protection, its a good idea anyway because sometimes friends' plans fall through and you get left without a bed). Show them your trip could be a benefit to your education. Show them activities you could do that relate to your major or intended major. Just another thing to play up...if your grandparents are religious or even semi religious Christians you could play up the religious aspect of it (going to see all the ancient churches etc). I'm sure you can think of other things...you know your grandparents better than me...

You could even make a PowerPoint presentation out of all of this...then you would look really serious.

Somehow I think your grandparents are not as against int'l travel as you think. Unless your G-ma got the passport behind your G-pa's back. There is no other reason to get a passport except to use it!!

[erin_canadian_chick]

Hi,
I used to be in the same situation (and still am sometimes!)..my first trip was at 19 and although ive only got one grandparent, she was very distraught about me going abroad.

Sometimes I find grandparents are afraid, first because they care about you and worry about your safety. They will feel better if you have done a lot of research and explain to them where you'll be going and what your plans are. My grandma also never had an opportunity for international travel in her youth, so its harder for her to accept and relate to the experience. She didnt realize that communication would still be easy, and she adored reading my emails and seeing pictures of my trip. I also got a cell phone and she liked being able to reach me anytime, try to get one if you are going for a long time. Also, if you can find some kind of contact person in the area you want to go to, this could also help to reassure them.

Hope everything works out for you

[marc873]

I agree with alllll the advice above! Especially, the NOT asking for permission, but just informing them that you are going... Then do all the things Liz said and present it well... If it takes that much effort with the grandparents... In the end when you are in Ireland, the effort will be worth the adventure!!! Best of luck!

[nhicolas]

yes everyone is right. Grand parents don't allow us or hesitate in doing so because they are concerned and care for us. They don't think that we are grown enough to travel alone. Even some time my grand ma stop my father from traveling to new places. But all we need to do is to sit by their side and make them understand that we are grown up now and can manage it. And you should also ensure them that you will be in touch and will give regular updates. Grand parents are always worried about us but we can make them understand. SO talk to them. Hope you will make it. Tell us afterward.

[Hassie]

Yes, I wouldn't specifically ask for their permission - I'd actually buy the tickets first (with trip insurance so you can change the date if you absolutely need to) and then talk to your grandmother very seriously first - get her on board, explain how important it is to you, and then when you talk to your grandfather she can help out in convincing him that it will be ok.

P.S. On a side note... I know you're young, but a word to the wise - be careful falling in love with an Irish man. I personally think they're amazing, but then hurts so much when you can't live in the same country as them/ see them etc.

[TheWills]

My 2 cents

Just go ahead. tell them, look its 2 weeks im gonna be with friends not really a huge deal. Its not like your thinking of going for a year or anything.
The whole "Im not paying for collage thing" Chances are its a bluff, if you get along really good with your parents or grandparents then Im sure they will pay for your collage anyways. You know them better than I do

But yeah just tell them this is what your thinking of doing and that you have the loot to do it. Who knows they might even support the idea, you never know just go and ask. Good luck and tell us how it goes.