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Old 04-06-2009, 11:46 AM   #1
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Default How to avoid paranoia during the backpacking trip.

So how do you avoid being paranoid and just focus on sucking the travel experience?

I'm ready to go backpacking in SE Asia next month, excited and scared. This is my first time and I don't really want to get carried away by those people around me who keep on giving me warnings trying to scare me and all that.

For those ladies who have traveled alone? How did you deal with the feeling of being alone far away from your home?I'm kinda imagining that kind of feeling when I won't be able to sleep, you know being miles away and don't know anyone.

I've just watched this Hostel movie Part 1 and 2, kinda scary but It's just a movie. Someone told me it's based on a true story.

Your thoughts?
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Old 04-06-2009, 01:52 PM   #2
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It's probably natural to be paranoid after you step off the plane/train. Only after you'e have a few beers, gotten used to the local environment, started meeting some people, etc... that you will start to relax.

The trick is to keep your guard up when you are having a good time, are relaxed and 'nothing can happen'.

And I'm pretty sure your hostel isn't actually some kind of organ processing plant... they probably make enough of a killing of you anyway, monetarily.
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Old 04-06-2009, 01:55 PM   #3
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I totally know what you're talking about...i will be travelling for the first time alone this summer to italy and it is really hard to ignore all the warnings from my family. it is my first time leaving the united states and neither of my parents have travelled abroad before so they are really freaking out. when i start feeding into all the scary stories i just try to focus on all the great things i am going to see and remember that i have confidence in myself! its nice that our friends/family worry, but think about how great it will be to come back from a great trip with awesome stories and pictures! and i've heard that if you are staying in hostels you probably wont feel lonely as long as you are open to meeting new people in the common rooms. just remember, its going to be great fun!
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Old 04-06-2009, 02:10 PM   #4
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Just think of it as a weekend away...a VERY long weekend away. I haven't been to SE Asia, so can't comment on that part of the world, but can on being a single gal traveling alone.

It's a great time!!! I was SUPER worried prior to my first solo trip. I had traveled with others but not by myself. If you're staying in hostels, you WON'T be alone. If you want someone to talk to, you'll have plenty of folks there.

Do it! You'll never look back.
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Old 04-06-2009, 02:11 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Canadian Bacon View Post
And I'm pretty sure your hostel isn't actually some kind of organ processing plant... they probably make enough of a killing of you anyway, monetarily.
hahaha, Laughed hard on this.
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Old 04-06-2009, 02:22 PM   #6
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I've not been to SE Asia either but did do Germany and Poland on my own and there is nothing more liberating than when you get home and everyone who tried to scare you and tell you you're crazy for traveling alone yada yada yada can see all the cool fucking shit you got to do and hear about your experiences.

Go for it, don't look back, and I bet this won't be your last solo trip.
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Old 04-08-2009, 04:01 PM   #7
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If you're feeling paranoid I would in fact recommend avoiding hostel-related horror films
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Old 04-09-2009, 08:23 AM   #8
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^ Seriously. This is why I've never watched the movie Hostel.
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

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Old 04-09-2009, 09:23 AM   #9
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I am pretty much going to echo what others have said. I did six weeks alone, i was in europe which is different, but i understand the fear. All you have to do is be aware of situations around you. If staying in hostels you won't be alone that much, so i just did things that i would do if i was at home. I avoided walking around alone at night. Walked like i knew where i was going(even when i didn't which happened a lot, i have a horrible sense of direction). But, in my opinion, traveling alone is the most liberating experience because it's all up to you. So, just try and relax because if you do you will have an amazing time!
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Old 04-09-2009, 10:44 AM   #10
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As I said on other threads... the best thing you can do and rely upon while going solo is to listen to your gut.

If in some situation your mind thinks its okay, but your gut has an uneasy feeling... you should back away from it. I have only gotten in trouble when I didn't listen to my gut, which I believe to be infinitely more wise than the mind (read that book blink).
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

"Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it."
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Old 04-09-2009, 01:36 PM   #11
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There are ways to avoid paranoia-one is to just find out what the dangers are and be aware and then, once you are think about why you want to go in the first place.
Paranoia is tough but man, I tell you nothing beats the feeling of accomplishment that comes with travelling, especially to a new land.
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Old 04-09-2009, 02:09 PM   #12
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I agree with CB. Definitly follow your instincts.

Dont be afraid or embarrassed if you feel uncomfortable around someone and you want to move away.
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Old 04-09-2009, 06:27 PM   #13
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CB - Blink is fascinating, and "trust your gut" is great advice.

Rocka - if you have the street smarts to be safe in your hometown or a nearby biggish city, you'll be fine. And I'm not talking about rough and tumble life on the streets, I'm talking about knowing when not to talk to strangers, when not to accept that free drink, where to go when you're feeling uncomfortable. Obviously you don't know the neighbourhoods to avoid in strange lands, but that's what guidebooks are for. Know to go into a hotel, restaurant or other public and generally busy place when someone's showing more interest in you than you like. Know not to tell every stranger you meet in a bar where you keep your passport and cash...

Basically, the whole world is full of regular people doing more or less the same things, just with different soundtracks. Once you discover that, it's much less intimidating to take those first solo steps.

Chances are that the people filling your head with horror stories are not actually telling you their own experiences, but rather, relating half-remembered hearsay about "a friend's uncle's cousin..."

Someone who has actually travelled will be more likely to bore you with tales of their adventures, favourite destinations and recommended eateries. Check out these boards if you have any doubts about that!

Of course, bad things happen - even crummy, rotten things, sometimes. But the cool thing is that, most of the time, after you've survived the rotten crummy thing, you realize that you are capable of dealing with the rotten crummy thing, and you're less worried about it happening again, because you know you can cope. The more you face, the more fears you conquer, the more confidence you gain. It's a virtuous cycle. That, I think, is the source of the traveler's high that comes from seeing the world, especially solo.

I think, too, that those horror stories you hear do have their roots in truth - well, some of them, anyway. The problem is in the interpretation. Travelers swapping stories inevitably turn to those challenges they've faced, and, as anyone who has been to a t'punk meet-up can attest, we tend to revel in those tales. Someone who has traveled before can imagine themselves in that position, think about what they would do, and appreciate the sense of accomplishment in dealing with the problem. Someone who hasn't been in a similar position can't capture that feeling, and so sees it only as a nightmare to be avoided at all costs.

Just a little example. A friend of mine originally planned to travel with me but didn't, so I went solo. When I showed her my pictures from early independence era Poland, she dismissed the entire experience in one sentence. "It all looks grey." Where I saw rebirth after communism, moody, rain-drenched early spring scenes, and buildings and streets exuding a thousand years of history and struggle and survival, she could only see cloudy skies.

Fortunately, by then I knew that was her loss, not mine.

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Old 04-10-2009, 04:10 AM   #14
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I'm up for anything, that's why I'm so decided to do it alone. I'm kinda obsessed with it right now. I've encountered some minor dangers even here in my own city, well it's everywhere, every part of the world I guess. I was out one night on my way home, 2 men, 1 pointed their gun at me, stole my wallet and my cellphone. So I think paranoia would help a little bit, it would make me extra careful and alert of my sorroundings. However I don't wanna get too paranoid, I just want to enjoy and focus.

@canadianbacon - I don't know why I watched that movie. Somebody recommended it, but It's ok, I just told him that's its a cool movie, but I'm still going anyway, and have the guts to do so. It's funny that some of my guy friends here can't travel alone. They are not open to my idea of backpacking alone. So it's like are they really just concern about me going alone? or are they just bitter because it's a shame that they are guys and can't do it.

@tumblezweedz - Thanks for the insights man. Well when I talk to people who have already traveled, they are the ones who are very supportive of my plans. You guys are the kinds of people I should be talking with. I'm sick of hearing about these warnings and all that from my friends. So I guess, I don't want to talk about it anymore, until I get there and have the pictures to show them, if they will listen.

A lot to learn from you peeps, I'll remember this.

Thanks to all!
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Old 04-10-2009, 06:35 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tumblezweedz View Post
The more you face, the more fears you conquer, the more confidence you gain. It's a virtuous cycle. That, I think, is the source of the traveler's high that comes from seeing the world, especially solo.
Word of wisdom...and a like that term you coined, "virtuous cycle"...!

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Old 04-10-2009, 06:53 PM   #16
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Thanks Mike, but it's not my coinage. According to wikipedia, it's used most often in economic theory, but that's certainly not where I picked up the term! Maybe Shakespeare?

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Old 04-11-2009, 11:46 AM   #17
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Hey, I think everyone has given great advice! I've traveled alone in both Europe & SE Asia and I also have had fantastic experiences.

There are a ton of people doing the same thing so you'll have a lot in common with everyone, which makes it so easy to meet people. I usually meet people and travel with them through a few places before we go our separate ways.

The one thing I always tell myself of when I'm feeling nervous is "I am going to find a place to sleep tonight/place I feel comfortable, ect." It has to happen, so stay confident and don't be scared to ask stupid questions.

Make sure you bring a credit card - it's always good in a pinch!
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Old 04-13-2009, 10:38 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Canadian Bacon View Post
I have only gotten in trouble when I didn't listen to my gut, which I believe to be infinitely more wise than the mind (read that book blink).
Hey is this the book you're referring to?

Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking by Malcolm Gladwell

I want to check it out.
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Old 04-13-2009, 05:17 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockababes View Post
It's funny that some of my guy friends here can't travel alone. They are not open to my idea of backpacking alone. So it's like are they really just concern about me going alone? or are they just bitter because it's a shame that they are guys and can't do it.
About 99 percent of the guys (and people) I know wouldn't do it... there are too many barriers in their mentality to do it. I'm just happy for those of us who decided to take the red pill :D
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

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Old 04-22-2009, 05:34 PM   #20
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Yes, that's the book.
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